Things that make me sad.

Last week was a sad week. Some things were justifiably sad, some were just random.
On the bus, three drunken youth harassing these indian guys for no other reason than they were indian, and feeling helpless to stop it.
At the mall, I saw a picture of tiger cubs, I used to have one just like it hanging in my house, I don't have it any more and it reminds me of all that I gave up, my brother gave it to me for Christmas.
Dropping off my resume to a mall coffee shop, made me cry. I don't want to work at the mall or at a coffee shop at the mall. I felt like a failure, and they didn't even give me a call back.
Deciding between a job I love and a job with better hours, making the hard decision then having the chosen option fall through.
Finding out that I am not pregnant.
Thinking about the fact I haven't changed my name to my married name yet.
Not being able to go to church because of work.

Our Wedding

Video chat rooms at Ustream

"We’re so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us that we don’t take time to enjoy where we are."

After what seemed like an eternity, it's happening. In 10 days I will leave the continent I have called home my entire life. That's right, I am gone. While I am very excited for this new adventure, and excited to see my darling Australian, today I am sad.
My brother was in for Thanksgiving this week. Not just my brother but my niece, my sister-in-law and her brother and sister. We had a lot of fun, laughed, hung out.
Last night my brother and I went out for coffee, there is a local coffee shop in town here, but it was after 8 and although they closed at 9, the guy was already mopping the floors, so we decided to just walk and talk around the streets of this small town. About an hour and a half later we headed to Sheetz where I introduced my brother to steamers. When we pulled back in the drive way, he took my hand and prayed with me and told me he loved me. This is what big brothers are supposed to do.
I remember when he first finished college I had just started and coming home for the summer meant visiting him a lot. I remember staying up all hours at his house eating cookie dough and drinking ginger ale. Sometimes we would have a socked feet rubber band war. I remember sitting on the couch quoting lines from calvin and hobbes and we both had read the books so much we merely referenced the page number and we both would laugh all over again.
I remember sitting in the next room while he dialed a girls phone number 20 times, hanging up before it started ringing because he didn't know what to say.
I remember when he was engaged to his wife and we took the craziest road trip ever to surprise my grandpa for Christmas. We drove 13 hours, had dinner and breakfast with grandpa and then drove back, forgoing the steak and shake milkshake in indiana, and then craving one the entire day until we were 30 mins from home and found another steak and shake. We are crazy folk.
Somehow in my whole life, I have always felt the odd one of the bunch, at work, at school and sometimes at home. My brother makes me feel like it's ok to be odd, and being odd is beautiful.
So today we said goodbye, not knowing when we would see each other next. He gave me a hug and started to cry, and I did too. I bequeathed my complete calvin and hobbes collection to his watch care. He will have to call me up and tell me about the joke on page 156...

Emma

Emma is my future sister in law. Shes one of the coolest chicks I know. Right now she's somewhere in Africa--and I am somewhere in Jealousy. She left home the end of July this year and is traveling until she's done. This has always been my dream. She is so brave and I am so proud to become her sister. She started touring some around Europe spending some time in Hostels, and couch surfing, visiting old friends. She got connected with an organization called HelpX. It's pretty similar to things like WWOOFERS (willing workers on organic farms) Providing room and board in exchange for various different jobs and work activities. A really cool way to see the world. This is of course after she finished el Camino de Santiago (the way of St. James) Its like an 800 km pilgrimage across Spain, I think that is flipping awesome.
Last week she sent me a post card of a giant spider sculpture from the Guggenheim museum in Bilbao, y'all know how I love bugs.
Anyhow, I thought a lot about her brave journey, and for her, this is a great time of discovery and personal reflection, A pilgrimage both literally and figuratively. I envy her travels but I do not envy her alone-ness, I respect that she can do but realize I will never be her, and I am me and I prefer cooking dinner with my fiance and reading a good book with him and adventure to me is something that should be shared. I am glad Emma is sharing her adventure with me-- through postcards and photos, it makes me feel like I am there with her, and I am in my thoughts and prayers.

What Did You Have On Your Pizza?

Complications with Andrew not being able to come here, made our proposal a bit unique. Friday night I got home from work, and Andrew and I had planned on Video chatting on skype, he asked my parents over the webcam if he had permission to ask me, Dad's response was "You have permission to pursue her until she catches you."

I suppose I caught him, because he seems to have caught me as well. After a few brief moments and apologies about the space and distance. He said he had a question to ask me,

"Yes!" I replied before he could even ask.

"What did you have on your pizza?"

"Oh, that's not the question I was expecting, um artichoke, peppers, onions, broccoli.."

"Mmm, sounds good. Well that's all I wanted to ask."

However I knew there was more, his smile told me so. He apologized again about the distance, and how he couldn't even do it proper on one knee because he would be out of camera range, then he cleared his throat and looked at me with his beautiful puppy dog eyes and said "Rebekah, will you marry me?" I didn't say yes this time, I paused and with tears in my eyes I said "Absolutely!"

This is the point in the story where the happy couple kisses and embraces, and he puts the ring on her hand, but there was none of that in our story yet. However, that doesn't make it any less memorable or real. I would love to not be on the otherside of the world now, but especially at that moment.

Andrew assures me that I may not know when or how, but I will get a real on the knee proposal one day, he doesn't want me to feel like I am missing out. I can honestly say traditional proposal or not, I am not missing out, and my answer will be the same. Plus it's probably a rare occasion he will be shorter than me.

Constellate

The sun hung out for a little longer today, as a reminder of the coming spring, I see the lengthening of days. When it finally slipped below the horizon, the stars began to appear.I think about that Chris Rice Song, And your Praise Goes on

"The moon is high and the sunset fades
The lullabies have all been sung
We’re tuckin’ in another day
And stars appear now one by one
But the stillness moves and the silence yields
And not a single beat is lost
You can hear the chorus in the fields

Taking up where we left off
And Your praise goes on, rising to Your throne
Where You guard us while we dream
Past the stars they fly, Your praises fill the sky
‘Til You wake us with the dawn
And Your praise goes on"

After my walk, I got home and continued reading in a passage I had open this morning from Colossians 3
"Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits at God's right hand in the place of honor and power. 2 Let heaven fill your thoughts. Do not think only about things down here on earth. 3 For you died when Christ died, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God. 4 And when Christ, who is your real life, is revealed to the whole world, you will share in all his glory.
5 So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual sin, impurity, lust, and shameful desires. Don't be greedy for the good things of this life, for that is idolatry. 6 God's terrible anger will come upon those who do such things. 7 You used to do them when your life was still part of this world. 8 But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language. 9 Don't lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old evil nature and all its wicked deeds. 10 In its place you have clothed yourselves with a brand-new nature that is continually being renewed as you learn more and more about Christ, who created this new nature within you. 11 In this new life, it doesn't matter if you are a Jew or a Gentile, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbaric, uncivilized, slave, or free. Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us.
12 Since God chose you to be the holy people whom he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 You must make allowance for each other's faults and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. 14 And the most important piece of clothing you must wear is love. Love is what binds us all together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are all called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
16 Let the words of Christ, in all their richness, live in your hearts and make you wise. Use his words to teach and counsel each other. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. 17 And whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus, all the while giving thanks through him to God the Father.

I like the first part where it talks about setting our sights on the realities of heaven. I don't think this passage is referring to the stars, but I think the stars are a good place to help us keep perspective, by showing us the power of God, our insignificance, as well as the example of worship. David wrote about the stars in the Psalms on more than one occasion.

When I look at the night sky and see the work of your fingers-
the moon and the stars you have set in place-
what are mortals that you should think of us,
mere humans that you should care for us? (Psalm 8:3-4)

He counts the stars and calls them all by name.(psalm 147:4)

Praise the Lord!
Praise the Lord from the heavens!
Praise him from the skies!
Praise him, all his angels!
Praise him, all the armies of heaven!
Praise him, sun and moon!
Praise him, all you twinkling stars!
Praise him, skies above!
Praise him, vapors high above the clouds!
Let every created thing give praise to the Lord,
for he issued his command, and they came into being.
He established them forever and forever.
His orders will never be revoked. (Psalm 148:1-6)

I see the stars appear and I am reminded of my insignificance in a giant universe, and I am reminded of the bigness of God that he could call each star by name. Each star is a reminder of a home that is other worldly, not like a martian landscape, but a place where we are free from the dominion of sin, and in the presence of His glorious light. As we prepare for that, we are given clear commands as to what that should look like, and not just physical things, but spiritual things. The act of putting to death certain things and putting off evil, and putting on the holiness of God. So do not focus on earthly things, but Let heaven fill your thoughts, both a physical heaven and a Spiritual one.

In Love.

After the last post, I thought I was done with eharmony. Frankly I was glad my time was over, it was valuable, I learned a lot. Phew. I was perfectly content to be single the rest of my life, I didn't really believe there was anyone out there that I could love that would love me with the same intensity.
Then came AS.
I didn't even see it coming, he happened to reach out in communication with me on a weekend where eharmony had so graciously given me a free weekend(great marketing on their part I might add). I didn't plan it, I didn't even think it would happen, and here we are many months later and I still want to pinch myself. To top it all off we live on different sides of the world.
He's brilliant, funny, kind, thoughtful, a man of God, a man of his word, he's honest and sincere. After all this I believe he could be a troll and I would think him handsome, but he's got beautiful deep kind chocolate eyes, a smile that makes me melt, a mess of unruly hair that I think is positively adorable.
The best of it is, he thinks I am beautiful, and by him thinking that I am becoming that. I am not talking about changing who I am, I am talking about bringing to surface what was already there, my posture is different, my countenance, I feel beautiful because he thinks I am. I feel lovable, because I am loved.
Its strange how that works, the people that mean the most to us, and how they feel about us affects how we feel about ourselves. Although I can't give the credit to AS, the very fact that he met me, loves me, and continues to love me, is by the grace of God. If I had not first understood my position in Christ's love, the beautiful creation he has made me and the grace he has given to redeem me, I wouldn't be in a place to recognize or accept AS's thoughts about me.
Sometimes things with AS seem like a whirlwind, I have never met anyone quite like him before, and his life overflows with the grace of God. Sometimes I feel like this is crazy and I am waiting for the other shoe to drop, there is no way I deserve anything this good--and I don't. But I keep coming back to Psalm 84:11 For the LORD God is our light and protector. He gives us grace and glory. No good thing will the LORD withhold from those who do what is right.(NLT) Not only is he looking out and protecting me but its for my good and his glory as I follow him in obedience.
Whatever my future with AS(Mrs. AS!!!!)I can be secure in knowing that I am beloved and beautiful to my God first. He has brought AS into my life for a process of sanctification, and to build my faith in Him. I don't know how the story is going to end, but I can be sure of this, God is able to do immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine, and he already has.

By Your Side

The past two months have been an interesting learning experience for me. The beginning of March I decided to join eharmony. I had been contemplating my alone-ness for a while, and thought I might have some valuable gifts to share with the male half of the species. I felt like options for potential dates in my age range had pretty much dried up. I didn’t know how to meet anyone else. Church is always a good place to start, and initially that’s the route I went, but it appeared my options were limited there as well. I had encountered some guys at work, we talked and we flirted, and realizing that we had nothing in common outside of work, those vanished like the rain in the desert.
So I signed up for eharmony. Recently I admitted to being a bit of a Romantic and Traditionalist. This was a hard step for an independent, self-sufficient 28 year old female. My whole life I was told I could do it, and I did. I shunned romance and fluffy things; they were equated with the female stereotypes in popular culture, that couldn’t seem to do anything without a man. Not having a man, I couldn’t have any hint of weakness. It wasn’t until M; he seemed like the perfect fit, won my heart that all these ideas of “thoughtfulness” came to mind. Suddenly I wanted to know things about him; I wanted to send him little gifts in the mail. I had a perfect plan for his birthday, being a photographer I was going to take pictures of the letters to spell “Happy Birthday” from the myriad of businesses and signs around my neighborhood. Then I was going to make them into simple post cards and send them all at the same time. That’s when I knew I had the heart of a romantic. It’s unfortunate that things didn’t work out with me and M, because I really think that was a great idea, but I have no motivation for it now.
One of my first conversations was with J; he was a really nice, funny man. He was honest from the get go about a physical disability he had, I was unsure, and I went through much prayer about it. I felt like I was a pretty horrible person if I couldn’t look past the fact that he was in a wheelchair. That’s when I learned about the shallowness of my heart. At first I tried to look for other things that were red flags about him. We conversated anyway. He taught me about how God can overcome things in our lives and he talked about past sin and the mercy and grace of God. I knew I needed some of that. I knew J wasn’t right for me, but not because of the physical which I thought initially, but there were goals and family differences as well. I thanked him for the chance to get to know him, and ended it because I respected him, and wasn’t going to toy with his heart. This was something I was learning too, something that continues to be hard for me. I didn’t want to put the good guys with the scum I encountered; I needed a separate folder for them called the-just-won’t-work-for-me-but-would-make-an-aweome-for someone-else-file.
That’s where A comes in. A was boring. I kept holding out hope that there was more to A. I asked him questions and he gave me one word answers. He didn’t understand my humor and mostly I ended up feeling bad. Probably why I decided to go ahead and talk to him outside of eharmony. He lived in the same state as I do. I sent him an email telling him that I would be back online later to chat I was going to church, and he sent me an email back asking for a raunchy picture of myself. I told him the inappropriateness of such an inquisition and challenged him with the word of God. He said he was sorry, I said I forgive you but I think you need to work some stuff out. That is where our conversation ended.
Each day I was challenged by more things, one by one my fairytales were breaking down. Little by little the lies I held about myself good and bad were being revealed. It was often overwhelming. It challenged me to be in the word more, to be who I said I was, to strive to be a better person. It went from trying to find the man of my dreams to finding what is God’s best for me, and knowing those things don’t have to be mutually exclusive. I dug in the scriptures more; God became the provider and sustainer of my joy. I wasn’t going to find that in a man. I still felt that God’s plan for my life was marriage, so I continued to do what he asked of me until he chooses to change my desires and move me along. I knew that until the right person came along I had a responsibility to become the woman they needed. I had opportunities to share my faith, and the love of my amazing God with some guys that needed it. I shared scripture and encouraged them to be men of God, even if things would never work out between us. I prayed for them, I prayed for me. I need courage to do the right thing which often meant standing by hard truths, or telling people goodbye. Things I had never done in my past relationships.
The hardest part came about a month ago. M and I had been talking for several weeks, sharing stories about life and love and God. I felt a real connection, I was hopeful for what was to come. Then one day he told me he thinks we should be “just friends.” I didn’t want to be just friends; that is not what I came to eharmony for. I knew that my goal was a husband to start a family with. To complicate the matter I couldn’t get any responses from anyone else on eharmony. While it was great I could devote all my time to M, it wasn’t real. I read an article the week of the “just friends” email. It was about the possibility of “just friends.” I had played that game before, and I always had a hope in my heart that it would be more than just friends, what girl doesn’t want to marry their best friend. We are relational like that, but I knew he didn’t see me that way and I chose to not talk to him anymore. I didn’t just leave him hanging I explained all this and I think he understood. Even after his last email, I felt I wanted to say more, but I didn’t. I had prayed specifically about him for weeks. I was so excited, I was so hopeful. I was so ready not to spend another $50 on eharmony. I gave him to God, and God said this isn’t who I want for you.
To me this was as close to real as I have ever gotten. Some of my friends didn’t think it was a big deal. These were people in committed relationships, had they forgotten what it was like to feel the nervousness of a new relationship and the hurt when it ends. To wait your whole life for something that didn’t work out? My heart was sad, but I felt good about it. Because I had chosen to do what was right over what would feel good. Did I want to still talk to M?—Yes. Did I want to be friends?—Yes and more. This was a huge step for me.
When it came time to renew my membership I chose not to. I had mixed feelings about it, I am terribly curious, and I wanted to see where it would go. Ultimately finances spoke louder than curiosity, and I needed a break to process the things God had been teaching me. I am not the same as I was, and for that I am thankful. One day I will be the woman that God wants me to be, and each day I get a little closer.
This song by Tenth Avenue North called “By Your Side” has really convicted and encouraged me in this time. Check it out here…

By Your Side

The area that this four spotted pennant calls home is the southeastern shrub bog which is also known as pocosin. Pocosin describes a type marshy or swampy wetland with deep, acidic, sandy, peat soils, without flowing water, containing ocean derived salts in concentrations of less than .05%, and is nontidal. Shrubs and Pond Pines are very common as well as Loblolly and Long Leaf Pines.
The Pond Pine is a tree found along the coastal plain of the eastern United States, it can reach a height of 30 meters but usually grows between 10 and 20 meters. . It has serotinous cones meaning they require fire to melt the resin to open and release the seeds. This is similar to the Canadian Jack Pine.
In summer 2008 an ongoing drought and a lightning strike started a blaze near the Pocosin Lakes National Wildlife Refuge. Many people believe drainage ditches and canals used to make the land agriculturally friendly in the mid part of last century has further dried out the carbon rich peat, to the point where prescribed burns to control wildfires were not conducted in such areas because of the risks. Much of the Pocosin Lakes National Wildlife Refuge , In Columbia, NC, where this photo was taken were consumed in the fire.
While this was good news for the reproduction of the Pond Pine, it was devastating news for some of the other species in the refuge. Namely the Red Wolf . This refuge was important to the reintroduction of the extremely vulnerable Red Wolf to the wild. Currently there are no known wild red wolves with about 100 total in population.
As for the dragonflies, I am sure they will return, Insects are incredibly adaptable, it may be decades before the diversity of the refuge returns. Dragonflies like the four spotted Pennant spend one to three years underwater and only emerge as adults for a couple weeks of their entire lives. Given the time of the wildfires, and the magnitude of the drought and the wildfire, not many survived last year.


http://www.fws.gov/Pocosinlakes/management.html
http://www.fws.gov/pocosinlakes/
http://www.newsobserver.com/news/story/1115666.html
http://www.refugewatch.org/2008/06/08/fire-at-pocosin-lakes-nwr/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pocosin
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pond_Pine
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palustrine
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_pine
http://bugguide.net/node/view/18776
http://www.geocities.com/brisbane_insects/DragonflyLife.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragonfly

The Black and Yellow Argiope spider is a member of the Orb weaver family of spiders each night is takes down and rebuilds its web, paying careful attention to construction of the web. These spiders are also known as writing spiders because of the zigzag pattern often found in the center of their web. The web can be more than two feet across with the ability to catch prey that is 200% its own size. Because of their poor eyesight, these spiders depend heavily on the vibrations of its web, making the construction of the web vital to its very survival.

As the spiders grow they have to molt their exoskeleton, they anchor their feet as the inside layer of their skin is digested and then they fall out of their old skin, they are particularly vulnerable as they wait for their new skin to harden. If the spider has lost a leg, it is even possible during this shedding process to grow a new one.

These spiders can create up to seven different types of silk, of varying thicknesses and stickiness. The silk is so different because the chemical composition is different for each type.

These spiders are usually found in sunny areas among flowers, in a spot that is out of the direct wind. They are not tolerant to the cold and usually die with the first hard frost.

After mating the females produce a large brown egg sack, the outer layers of which are specially designed to protect the young spiders from predators, and parasites like wasps, which will eat the spiders before they can hatch.

I found one of these spiders, outside my church. Insects have always been fascinating for me; even now I have several specimens in my kitchen freezer. Often I am found crawling around on the ground attempting to photograph such a critter. Strange and beautiful creatures, the same hand that spoke the spider into existence, procured our salvation. We often miss the little details that remind us of just how great our God is.

The web provides shelter, protection and sustenance for the spider, but the spider must live in the web and responsive to the vibrations. I am reminded of the passage of scripture in John 15:4-7(NIV) “Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.” We find our life and shelter when we are connected to the vine, like the spider in its web.

I also look back on my life already and remember the little exoskeleton hanging from the web, how small and immature I once was, and by God’s grace I am shedding the sin of my former self. I am being transformed by the renewing of my mind through the word of God. (Romans 12:2) I still have many more layers to shed, that’s the process of sanctification, there are things even now that keep me stunted in my faith. I can relate to Thomas who wanted to see Christ with his own eyes, to touch the scars with his own hands after the resurrection, sometimes I don’t have the spiritual vision and I must by faith depend on the vibrations of the web, and trust that God is in control, even when I can’t tell he is.

I was amazed to learn that this spider reconstructs the web every day, which shows a dedication that I lack as a human. I get busy and I have my prayer time and my bible reading but I don’t spend time crafting the relationship as I ought. Each day this spider carefully takes down and rebuilds the web, a process that takes lots of time and energy and effort, it takes all of its resources to maintain the relationship it has with this structure. But it was crafted for this purpose; it was given the ability to produce the seven chemically different strands of silk required to build its web. I too was crafted for this relationship; I was designed for fellowship, with Almighty God, but how easily I lose of sight of that.

Fortunately I have a God of grace and mercy who isn’t dependent on my works. That is so profound, even writing that now, doesn’t truly account for the magnanimity of the idea. He has given me everything I need for life AND he made it beautiful. I’ve spent the last few years bringing a vision for His creation and the splendor of his works through my photography. Studying the details of just one of his many creations, I am able to share that with others to increase his glory. My praise is so much more rich, my worship so full, to realize that the same God that spoke the world into existence, came down as a man, so that fellowship could be restored with me.

I think about how because I am His child he wraps me in the safety of his arms. Even better than the protective layers of the egg sack, I am surrounded by his love, safe in the shelter of his wings. The world rages around me, but The Sovereign and Mighty is holding me. What a God!

So by faith, God is bringing me back to a place of indepth study of his word, and I believe a place to minister the wonder of creation to others around me. His grace has sustained and blessed me these last few years, but I am seeing him moving me into a new direction, and I believe this is the step I must take by faith, I just can’t believe it took me almost seven years to figure this part out.

Bartlett, T. 2004 “Species Argiope Aurantia - Yellow Garden Spider” (online), Bugguide.net, accessed December 16, 2008 at http://bugguide.net/node/view/2025

Hammond, G. 2002. "Argiope Aurantia" (On-line), Animal Diversity Web. Accessed December 16, 2008 at http://animaldiversity.ummz.umich.edu/site/accounts/information/Argiope_aurantia.html.

Valerie .2004 “Argiope” (online), Garden Bits, Accessed December 16, 2008 at http://home.att.net/~larvalbugrex/argiope.html

Blue Letter Bible. "John 15 - New International Version." Blue Letter Bible. 1996-2008. 16 Dec 2008. < b="Jhn&c="15&t="NIV">

Steal it all.

Tonight I came home, after being out all day to find a bright green flyer in my door handle. I love it how it was a flyer warning about break ins, nothing says nobody home like no car in the driveway, a for sale sign in the front yard and a bright green flyer in the door handle--I mean really?!?
I thought it was bad a couple weeks ago, when someone stole the flyer box off my for sale sign. I know times are rough, and everybody is feeling the pinch but what is the market value for a flyer box?
I feel like I really am living a nightmare. I have recurring nightmares since my break-in back in August. Everyone I knew said it was so lucky that i wasn't home when they broke in. I always think who is the lucky one? I don't know if they are so brazen yet to break in when someone is home. I just know in my dreams/nightmares about the break in, it always involves me and a baseball bat, sure I may not be able to hit a good pitch but you break into my house, and you will realize you have way more surface area than a baseball, and although I don't have any baseball bats around, a chair, a broom, a shovel, are all things I have very close and i will use them.
I am generally a non-violent person. I'm peace-loving and gentle, really. But this city is sucking all of that out of me. Between traffic and these "incidents" that seem to keep happening and the fact that you leave your Wild Irish Rose liquor bottle, from the cash only convenience store, on my front yard everyday, has me at my wits end.
In the past year my house has been broken into, they got away with a computer, a laptop, a digital camera, and a drill. My car(poor Lola the Corolla) has been shot, yes folks I found the bullet in the trunk. My car has also been broken into, the thieves unsuccessfully tried to steal the stereo, so in turn they managed to get away with some cheap earrings, and a wind up flashlight, and make it so when I accelerate the whole dash falls off.--thanks.
I want to put a big sign up on my front porch saying come on in take what you want, followed by some very vulgar names and swearing. I suppose that won't help sell the house. Coming home is a nightmare. Not only is it incredibly hard after a weekend with family to come home alone, to my empty house, but to know that when I get home my house could have been broken into again and all my stuff rifled through and my just back to normal-finally-settled-the-insurance life would be disrupted again. I feel like I need to pack everything up and put anything of marketable value at the bottom of my dirty clothes, but they would probably go through those too. I wish I still had the litter box from my cat, I should get one just to store valuables, nobody rifles through a litter box. What I really want is to not be alone and have to do all this by myself again.
I need a dog, I wonder if anyone will rent me one to keep around during the day when I'm at work. I can't seem to train the turtles to attack intruders, is it bad to wish Salmonella on them for breaking into the house? Maybe they will decided to touch something of the turtles and get sick, they will probably just blame it on the peanut butter crackers they ate earlier in the day. Maybe I should get a big cage and beware of snake signs, or maybe I should just get out of this town, that is the plan, as soon as I convince someone why they should buy my house. It's kinda a catch 22 isn't it? I can't move from the neighborhood because of the neighborhood. It makes me laugh in that tragic, cynical, situationally ironic kind of way.