Locked

The keys are locked inside; I could get a locksmith if I could trust one.
Then once they get inside I still have to find the keys before I can actually go anywhere.
Everyone has gathered around they keep telling me that I shouldn’t lock my keys in the car and that I should be more careful.  Why don’t the spectators get a life? Because they are seeing me on my way, and they are seeing me—an idiot for locking the keys inside. I wish they would just leave, as if I needed their statements of the obvious.  As if they have never done that before.  
There is a spare set of keys but the one who has them is far away.  I called him to come, and maybe he will, maybe I can just get it done before he comes, and it seems so stupid to bother him when I am the one that locked the keys in the car.    
I’m so frustrated now, like I am the one that’s locked without a key.  I am just trying to get out of here, but it’s taking longer than I thought.  These people are never going to let me live this down; I’ll hear about this the rest of my life.  Even when they are silent I hear their thoughts, “How could anyone be so stupid…”  
The locksmith can’t get in, and on top of that there is now a big scratch on my door.  I call for the key, he still won’t come.  I’m so mad I throw the phone across the parking lot, as it slams into tiny pieces I sit down on the gravel next to the car and start to cry.  The tears have blurred all the faces of those that are still standing around watching me.  My anger burns, I don’t want them to see me, I feel so dumb.  
Finally he’s here, he helps me off the ground and without a key opens the passenger side which has been unlocked the whole time, I sit down and he uses his key to open the driver’s side and start the car.  My lost key had been slammed in the door of the car as I shut it, and it wouldn’t work anymore anyway.  I don’t care that it took him so long, I'm just glad he’s here.  “I was busy, I came as soon as I could, trust me you’ll see” he assured me.  
“I didn’t think you were ever going to come, I feel so foolish, and I’m so frustrated and the car and the scratch and the price of the locksmith and …”  
“Its ok I got it covered.”
“But…”
“But nothing, its ok, I needed to drive anyway, you would have never found this place on your own.”
“Anyway I’m glad I don’t have to be around those people anymore, I felt like such an idiot.”  
“Why?!?, I sent them to you, didn’t you see how happy they were when I came to help you, they weren’t there to judge you, they were there to help you, you had it all wrong, everyone of them has done the same thing, and I had to come pick them up too, they will meet us there tonight when we get home, you’ll see it will be different.”
“I should have waited for you, instead I called the locksmith and now there is this bill I can’t pay.”
“I said I would take care of it, a lot of people call the locksmith, and sometimes he actually gets them into their cars but they still don’t know how to get where we are going, I know you didn’t think I was coming, and that’s ok because I came and you are here now, and you are going to love what I have planned for you…”

this to shall come to pass

I got some new music for Christmas, YAY! For new music, YAY! That Christmas is over, not that I don’t like Christmas but I don’t like Christmas.  I am not a scrooge and if you really want to know all the reasons I hate Christmas I will tell you but I am not going to drag it around through this blog again every year.  So I have been listening to this song Beauty from Pain from the title track off of superchick's latest album.  I guess it speaks to me especially right now because I am reading through the psalms as well.  
“… and all that’s left is to accept that it’s over, my dreams ran like sand through the fists that I made…after all this has passed, I still will remain, after I’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain, though it wont be today, someday I’ll hope again… and you’ll bring beauty from my pain…my whole world is the pain inside me the best I can do is just get through the day, when life before is only a memory I wonder why God lets me walk through this place, and though I cant understand why this happened I know that I will when I look back someday, and see how you’ve brought beauty from ashes and  made me gold purified through these flames…..and there will be beauty from pain…”I guess it kinda puts into perspective all that we go through and in reference to another song on this album “…And so each step that she’s taking is a step of faith toward who she’ll be…”  I am facing a lot of uncertainties right now, but I know one thing that is for certain and that’s God.  And I am ok with that.